A warm, damp wind blows my hair and my face as I walk up Tremont Street, making my way to work. It has rained during the night and the streets show recent puddles. The fifty percent accurate weather forecast reckons it will rain some more, and then the temperature will drop and snow will begin during the night.
The weather in New England is as fickle as the human heart and causes almost as much chaos and damage. But, unlike the heart, the weather is given more grace by others.
I think about this today as I walk. I’m tired. I feel the weight of life’s journey on my body. I know myself well enough that I won’t make any decisions right now. As sages are wont to say “this too will pass.” But it still feels difficult. It still feels like I’m not doing enough to bring light, grace, and joy into this world of grey.
But maybe it’s not about me doing ‘enough’ — maybe it’s about me relaxing and realizing that I need to stop. I need to stop and inhale grace with each breath – breathe in, breathe out. Inhale, exhale. Breathe in grace, feel it fill my body.
Unsure of my own words and thoughts, I gratefully read those of another:
“The grace of God means something like: Here is your life. You might never have been, but you are because the party wouldn’t have been complete without you. Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don’t be afraid. I am with you. Nothing can ever separate us. It’s for you I created the universe. I love you. There’s only one catch. Like any other gift, the gift of grace can be yours only if you’ll reach out and take it. Maybe being able to reach out and take it is a gift too.”
“Life is grace. Sleep is forgiveness. The night absolves. Darkness wipes the slate clean, not spotless to be sure, but clean enough for another day’s chalking.”
― Frederick Buechner, The Alphabet of Grace
I breathe in once again and know I’m ready for another day’s chalking, another day of grace.
5 thoughts on “Inhaling Grace”
Thank you for this. I’m having a hard day myself, following on a hard couple weeks. The night usually wipes the slate clean for me, but apparently not lately. Love, E
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Marilyn, I don’t comment a lot, but I click “like” each time I read a post so that you feel validated and because I really like what you write. “He giveth more grace..” is a song I get encouragement from, as Bettie Rose noted. We do tend to get caught up in what we think we need to be doing, what we think God is expecting from us, etc. and forget to rest in Him. As I deal with cancer and chemo, resting in Him is becoming more and more important, as my energy decreases and I realize I can’t DO what I used to, that I musts focus on BEing more, and live out my faith by trusting in God and not trying to be in control myself.
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Ah, “This too shall pass” is a direct translation of my favorite Latin epic poet Virgil. It comes from his pep talk which he gives to his men who were all refugees from another Middle Eastern city which had fallen. The hero Aeneas says, “forsan et haec olim meminisse iuvabit,” meaning roughly, “Perhaps someday we will enjoy remembering even these things.”:
“He giveth more grace….His grace has no measure…” and “Amazing Grace how sweet the sound…” Marilyn, I often go to hymns to find words that speak for and to me when I am speechless. Have a grace day. :)
The saving grace… ;-)