The Children’s Ward – A Guest Post

Hospitals in the developing world are unforgettable – the overwhelming need, the overpowering smells, and the helplessness that one feels are etched in the memory. But they are also unforgettable because often in the midst of all that seems unholy – there are redemptive, holy moments.

Today’s post takes us to a busy, crowded hospital in Swaziland through a guest poster, Lesley Keyter – known by many as The Travel Lady. There will be more on Lesley at the end – for now read on!

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Border between Swaziland and South Africa

As I walk into the hospital I instinctively stop breathing through my nose.

I can’t describe the smell – a mixture of urine, body odour, stale bandages, dust and floor polish. Probably fairly typical of a small under-financed hospital in a poor African country.

In 1986 at only 18 years old King Mswati III was crowned King of Swaziland. At that time he was the youngest king in the world and one of the last absolute monarchs. With a population of a million people this small landlocked Kingdom, sandwiched between South Africa and Mozambique, relied heavily on foreign aid and volunteer organisations.

A corrupt government plus a teenage king with a taste for luxury meant that the country’s most needy were left to fend for themselves.

The hospital corridors are crowded with patients, lying on the floor, sitting in the sun, eating mealies (corn cob). Most of them show signs of horrible wounds with dirty bandages and open sores. Most are laughing and joking – it’s an African thing that even in the middle of the worst situation there is always time for a laugh. The occasional patient lies there silently suffering and in one corner an old woman looks like she is not breathing at all. Her skin is a dusty gray and her wasted legs are covered by a tartan blanket. I have learnt that it is best to keep breathing through my mouth and keep my eyes ahead.

I reach the children’s ward and pass one small ward after another until I get Ward 8. Our small group of children are abandoned but the Swazi Government refuses to believe there is such a thing as an abandoned child. It is contrary to tribal custom. So the children end up here in the hospital, in Ward 8 as long term residents. Our volunteer efforts provide nannies, toys, food and even school fees and school uniforms.

“Aish Medem – I am glad you are here” – Julia greets me as I come in. “I need help with Mandla – he won’t eat his phutu(porridge) and I am busy with the baby”.

Mandla is a hefty 4-year-old with Down Syndrome. He’s quite strong and a handful at times. I get to work, distracting him with my car keys while I shovel the porridge into him while I have the chance. Julia is working with the new baby – just 3 months old already diagnosed with TB and (we are sure but nobody says the word) probably dying from AIDS.

No sooner am I finished with Mandla – a huge clean up involving his face, hands, chair, floor and toys – than Precious needs a diaper change. She is 3 years old and this is the only home she has known. She is still not talking properly. Julia is walking around with the baby (as yet unnamed) with a deep frown making the characteristic clicking noises of disapproval with her tongue.

“What is it Julia?” I ask from the depths of the diaper bucket.

“Hey Medem, I do not know what to do about thees baby. She is very very sick but the doctor he says he is too busy and this one is going to die anyway so he cannot spare the time”. Julia’s eyes fill with tears and I can see that the doctor is right. The baby is so thin – overwhelmed by the diaper. Her breathing is shallow.

“Well maybe we can speak to the Red Cross or Save the Children,” I suggest. Surely there must be someone who can get some help to this baby – give her a fighting chance.

“Well Medem – it is in God’s hands”

Indeed, I think to myself. I’ll see who I can phone when I get home.

I feel a sharp tug at my skirt and look down distractedly. There is Mandla – his characteristic Down Syndrome eyes gleaming with delight. In his hand he has my lipstick and has managed to paint it all over his face. He looks up at me with a big smile –  a glimmer of hope in the Children’s Ward.

About Lesley

As a Navy brat Lesley is no stranger to travel.  She was born in England and in her arrived_logo (3)teens emigrated to South Africa. From there it was just a short hop to the tiny African Kingdom of Swaziland where she lived for 17 years. She now calls Calgary Canada her home and has turned her love of travel to a thriving business known as The Travel Lady.

“Mother Hubbard’s Cupboard is Bare” Salad – Thoughts on Plenty

Old Mother Hubbard and Her Dog
Old Mother Hubbard and Her Dog

Last week temperatures were in the low eighties in this unseasonably warm March, and all of Boston not only thawed but were seen sweating. On Thursday night, after working up a healthy appetite from a long walk on the Charles River, we got home to a cupboard reminiscent of a nursery rhyme: Mother Hubbard’s Bare Cupboard. There was no lettuce, no onions, no garlic, a couple sad-looking tomatoes (good only for cooking) no lentils, – it felt impossible and I realized in this case I was Mother Hubbard, and it wasn’t bones I needed for dogs. It was supper for my family.

Too tired to head to the grocery store, I stood staring in silence at an open, near empty refrigerator, hoping that inspiration would come to me. And an idea was borne. I had a half cup of left over fresh salsa, a can of corn, a box of pasta, a quarter cup of goat cheese, a half a cucumber and 4 frozen chicken tenderloins.

A half hour later I had Mother Hubbard’s Cupboard is Bare” Salad – Delicious.  I thawed the chicken and cut it into small pieces, then sautéed it in olive oil. Placing it in a bowl I added the fresh salsa, corn, chopped up cucumber and goat cheese. While that cooled, the pasta cooked. 8 minutes later I rinsed off the pasta with ice-cold water and added it to the chicken mix.

It was an amazing salad, fresh and delicious. And it got me thinking – about my cupboard and what I consider bare, compared to a good number of people in the rest of the world. I thought it was bare because I didn’t have what I wanted.…not because it really was bare. Truth be told, we ate well and with a bit of fruit salad left over and some fresh strawberries, we even had a dessert.

In even a seemingly bare naked cupboard, I have so much. Through the simple act of creating a meal, I was given yet another lesson in plenty versus nothing. Had I seen only through the poverty of my eyes, I would have continued to see the cupboard as bare. Through left over salsa and goat cheese, corn, chicken and cucumber, my eyes opened wide with gratefulness at all that I have, and awareness of what others may lack. Perhaps the salad needs to be renamed to “Mother Hubbard’s Cupboard Has Plenty But You Need Good Eyesight to See it” Salad. 

Old Mother Hubbard, She went to the cupboard, to get her poor doggie a bone. But when she got there, the cupboard was bare, and so the poor doggie had none!

“I Stumble and I Fall” – the Poverty Challenge

For a long time I have wanted Cecily Thew Patterson to write a guest post for me. I first met Cecily when I returned to Pakistan with my husband and we were working at the boarding school I attended through high school. At the time Cecily was a pretty, outgoing girl who already had the marks of a strong woman. Cecily is now a beautiful and strong woman.  I hesitated asking her for a post because I know she has several writing projects going on, as well as many other hats to wear. But today I get to introduce you to Cecily and her writing as she takes us into a struggle many of us have – the poverty challenge. She shares personally and poignantly from the perspective of someone raised in Pakistan.

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Like Marilyn, I grew up in Pakistan. Like Marilyn, I also went to boarding school in the Himalayan mountains. And I’m guessing that I was like Marilyn in the way that all junior high kids resemble each other. We all have to work out who we are by facing challenges. Some will make us grow and fly and others will make us stumble and fall.

Clothes were the challenge that made me stumble and fall.

While none of us were wealthy, some people in our school did better than others in the clothes department. I felt like I always had trouble trying to look nice. There weren’t any western clothes shops in Pakistan, I didn’t have a lot of things sent out from Australia, so whatever I could get that was a bit fashionable was really precious to me. I couldn’t just replace a ripped shirt or update old shorts. I had to take care of my stuff. I really wanted to look nice and fit in so I tried hard.

The reason I was at boarding school was because my parents lived in the Sindh desert in a tiny village. There were no local schools for me to go to so my brothers and I went away to study. Even though our school was not in a well-to-do area of Pakistan, and there was plenty of poverty around us, it was still always a big shock when we went home to the village for our three-month winter holiday every year.

Pakistani Family (courtesy of Tim Irwin)

The poverty in rural Sindh is confronting. People are extremely poor, many living in traditional mud huts. There’s no power and no piped water and not much transport. Everything is done by hand. Some people my parents knew were so poor they couldn’t afford to eat more than twice a day. They didn’t even have any sugar for their tea.

Most people had two sets of clothes; one for every day and one for weddings. And because the weather was extremely hot for nine months of the year, many people didn’t have any clothes that would keep them warm in the winter.

It was a hard place to live. And I had a soft heart. I really wanted to help. It broke my heart to see people struggling so much when I had everything I needed and wanted. I really wanted to make a difference.

An opportunity came when we went out to a town called Mithi to visit some friends. This family had brought in a big load of second-hand jumpers and jackets and were going to give them out to a few specific villages that were really poor.

I was excited to be invited to join in. This was going to be my first real hands-on experience of helping people in dire need and I was feeling nervous but also a bit righteous at the same time.

Out we went one evening in the landrover to the villages. We gave out all the jumpers and sweaters. But then we realised there weren’t enough for everyone. Some people had to miss out.

And then someone tugged at my sleeve and pointed to my jumper. I didn’t speak her language but I knew what she was saying. “Can I have that jumper?” she asked with her expression and her body language.

I was shocked. I was wearing a turquoise sweatshirt that I loved. It had come from Australia, it was my favourite colour and it went with heaps of things. I only had six sweaters and this was my best one.

But the woman tugging at my sleeve was asking if she could have it. She had no sweatshirts and there were more people in her village who had none as well.

What would you have done? Would you have given her the jumper? Or would you have kept it?

Throughout junior high school I met a lot of challenges and many of them were opportunities for me to grow and fly. This woman, tugging at my sleeve, was the challenge that made me stumble and fall. Flat on my face.

I said no.

I gathered myself up and I moved into the landrover where she couldn’t reach me. I talked to myself and told myself that it was ok, that I couldn’t be expected to give up my own sweater, that if I had given it to her my mother would have been cross because she couldn’t have replaced it, that I needed it for school, and besides, it wouldn’t be good if I didn’t look after my own things. I told myself that the woman would be okay, that she was probably just a ‘taker’ and that she shouldn’t have asked.

I still wish, 25 years later, that I had taken off my turquoise sweatshirt and given it to the hungry, thin woman who asked me for it.

And I’m still struggling to know how to respond when I come face to face with real people who have bigger needs than I do. I wish I was more generous, but I’m scared of what might happen if I am. Pray for me.

How do you respond to poverty? How have you responded? It’s a hard but necessary conversation so join in through the comments.

Author Bio: Cecily Paterson is trying to live an uncluttered life, although she feels like she’s behind the eight-ball to begin with in having four children and a recalcitrant dog to feed and keep happy. Cecily is an author, most recently of Love, Tears & Autism, a memoir of the five years following her son’s diagnosis with autism. She’s a fan of honesty and candour and always tries to tell the truth. While she grew up in Pakistan, she’s very happy now to live in small town Australia and would prefer not to move for a long time. Cecily blogs at Cecily.Mostly. Check it out!

“You Mean I’m Not Invisible?”

I often write on Saturdays about sitting comfortably on pillows with my coffee. I think because these are the days when I realize I am one of the small percentage of people in the world that has that sort of comfort and luxury. I have time to think about the week and revel in the luxury of time.

Just yesterday I walked past a bruised woman, sprawled on the street, trying to look into people’s eyes and beg for spare change.  She is a regular fixture on the street, just part of the scenery along with store fronts, fruit stands, and vendors selling t-shirts. I’ve had interactions with her before. One time I threw away her shoes, because I thought she wanted them thrown away, only to be screamed at in colorful language (who first termed swear words as colorful in writing anyway??) “Bring me back those %$&#@ shoes!” Thankfully I was able to retrieve them and an unlikely relationship is developing, when she is sober enough to remember me. I turned back after she shouted “Am I invisible?” toward some people walking the other way. As I went back she threw up her hands and said “You mean I’m not invisible?” I laughed “No – you’re not invisible. You’re quite loud!” She laughed too, thanked me for the change and went back to shouting after people.  Another reality check from the city!

I don’t know much about the homeless. It is my daughter Stefanie, a passionate advocate, who has been able to help me understand a bit more about this complicated issue and I plan to have her do a post for me soon. But I think a lot of us know about feeling invisible – as though people look through, not at us. Sometimes, like the homeless woman, we may long to shout out “Am I invisible?”. We feel as if we are insignificant, like ants busy going about their business in the ant world, but stepped on easily by others.

Sitting here, with time to contemplate, I am aware that though I may feel invisible to much of the world around me, I have a Maker and Creator intimately aware of my needs and longing to be a visible presence in my life. To Him, we are fully visible, fully worthy, fully loved.

Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?~ Matthew 6:26